The run-up to the presidential primaries offers a funhouse reflection of American life. Presidential hopefuls, hacks, and has-beens turn to focus groups to discover what they think the American electorate wants. Then they distill it down to hollow bumper stickers. After that, they pump their fists and reflect it back with mindless repetition.
Change We Can Believe In. Feel the Bern. Make America Great Again. Sí Se Puede. Fighting for Us. Compassionate Conservatism. A Stronger America. Ross for Boss. Morning in America. Not Just Peanuts. Nixon’s the One. Dean Scream. And much, much, more…
The mantras are both idiotic and comical. They provide political lemmings with something to believe in. They also provide incisive observers with a unique prism into the menaces of tomorrow.
For example, presidential candidate Elizabeth Warren’s slogan is: “Warren Has a Plan for That.” An official t-shirt, adorned with this slogan, will set you back just $30 bucks. And you can pick up a slogan emblazoned tote bag for $35. What a bargain!
To any onlooker with their wits about them this mantra is utterly absurd. But to Warren, it’s as serious as a heart attack. She does, indeed, have a plan for everything – even if it means instant death. In fact, her official website includes the following sales copy:
“Child care unaffordable? Big corporations and billionaires not paying their fair share? Want more economic and political power in the hands of the people? Don’t worry, Warren has a plan for that.”